Monday, 2 May 2011

Osama Bin Laden - An Obituary


Osama Bin Laden – the world’s most wanted fugitive – has been killed by US forces. As with all news stories of this scale, there has been a huge and varied reaction.

But first, as a quick recap…

Osama Bin Laden was the founder of al-Qaeda, which is probably the most powerful and widespread terrorist network we have ever been up against. He was born and grew up in Saudi Arabia with a silver spoon in his mouth – the 25th (or thereabouts) son of a billionaire construction tycoon. He was a smart kid, no doubt about it, and it was at University that he really started to forge an interest in radical Islamist politics. 

From there, he started setting up Islamic schools in Pakistan.

The Taliban – which is the very strict and scary militia group that operates today in Afghanistan and parts of Pakistan – mostly arose from the these very schools, and have thus always been strongly linked to Bin Laden. 

Things really started going south when; furious that Saudi Arabia had started chumming up with the West in the early 90’s, Bin Laden was expelled from his native country for being too inflammatory and mental. 

Being reasonably clever, very angry and stinking rich – Bin Laden could now go about founding a terrorist group unlike any other. His aim? The Islamification of the whole world. His strategy? Terror, literally. Bin Laden orchestrated a number of major attacks throughout the 90’s; leading up to the (alleged) bombing of the Twin Towers in New York, ten years ago in 2001. Since then he has been evading capture by the US. Until now.


Bin Laden was found living in a luxury compound in Pakistan – a stone’s throw away from Pakistan’s key military base. According to most, this is blatant proof that Pakistan was concealing and protecting him in some form. Which, if true, could spell all out war with America. Pakistan has long insisted that they have checked *absolutely everywhere*, and that there was no way Bin Laden was hiding within their borders. They have also been accepting about $1billion a year from America to help try and ‘track him down.’

US Special Forces have been motoring this property for months, and as soon as they were sure Bin Laden was living there; Obama ordered his death. He was shot in the head, and allegedly has already been buried at sea. 

So what can we conclude? The move has certainly given Obama an enormous popularity boost. Most of America see this as much needed and long overdue justice.

Skeptics and conspiracy theorists think the whole thing is rubbish and than Bin Laden is either still alive, or has already been dead for years. 


Whatever the case, this obviously does not spell the end for al-Qaeda. If anything, it is likely to rile them up more. Obama has warned America and its allies to be extremely vigilant, as revenge attacks should be expected any time now. 

Honestly, nothing else particularly significant happened in the news today…

Sunday, 1 May 2011

Trump Trumped... and other news...


Good Sunday,

It has been difficult, again, to eke out much other news in the UK that isn’t centered around where Kate and William will be going on their honeymoon; and what went down at the wedding speeches. We don’t know where the honeymoon will be, and Prince Harry apparently referred to his brother – and our future King – as a ‘major dude.’ In case you were interested.

Here’s what else has happened today:

Factories in China, which are working fiendishly to produce enough apple iPads and iPhones to meet demand, have reached new lows. Due to the excessive number of recent worker suicides – (terrible working conditions, overly strict and often bullying bosses; and stupidly long hours mainly to blame) – factory owners have made a new rule. No-one is allowed to commit suicide and everyone is now required to sign a pledge promising not to. For obvious reasons, it is fair to say that they are barking up the wrong tree here.

Over in Afghanistan, following the Taliban’s warning only yesterday that more attacks should be expected, four have been carried out today. One gunman opened fire on a police checkpoint, one bicycle bomb wounded at least 13 civilians and – worst of all – a 12 year-old boy blew himself up in a crowded market in Paktika.

In Tawain, a blogger and self proclaimed ‘Prophet’ has caused widespread panic by predicting a huge earthquake and tsunami there, on the 11th of May. Police suspect he is conspiring with a cargo-container company to make money. Why? Because he has recommended that worried people should fork out the equivalent of over £3k for one of these things... to ‘hide in’ when the ‘natural disaster’ strikes. Don’t hold your breath.

Gaddafi’s loyalists have (predictably) flipped out following Nato’s killing of (another) of the leaders sons; and have today been attacking British and Italian embassies in Tripoli, as well as UN offices. The UN is subsequently withdrawing all its international staff from the capital.

Finally, on a much lighter note – President Obama has trumped Donald Trump, by embarassing him publically at the annual ‘White House Correspondents Dinner.’ Trump has been loudly accusing Obama recently of lying about his birthplace, and therefore being an illegitimate leader - accusations that were silenced last week when Obama produced his birth certificate for all to see.

So the President took to the stage and opened his speech with the display of a pre-produced music video; featuring images of America, shots of his birth certificate and a very patriotic soundtrack entitled ‘Real American.’ He then went on to say that if the paperwork wasn’t enough proof, his guests would next be treated to an official video of his birth. At which point he brought up a clip from Disney’s 'The Lion King', featuring the birth of Simba. You can watch it here, and you really should. Trump was in the audience, and turned out to be the only person in the room unamused by Obamsa’s stunt.

See you tomorrow…